Holy Incompetence, Batman!!

So the nice lady at Social Security left me a message on our land line telephone stating that I needed to supply them with a certified copy of my birth certificate because I had lost my old copy in a basement flood. No, she said when I called her back, I could not provide copies of all of those documents that I have that are based upon previous presentations of the lost birth certificate. I had to re-prove my birth, in case I was trying to establish a false identity and steal my own meager benefits. So I contacted the City Clerk for my esteemed home town of Woonsocket, RI and found that I had to send a check via the USPS to get a copy of the birth certificate. No, there is no way to order via the internet or telephone or fax. No, a credit card payment is impossible. Send a check in the mail. OK. I received said birth certificate. Unfortunately, it had no birth date on it. How in the hell can a city clerk's office send out a birth certificate without a birth date on it? Of course, each person with whom I spoke at the clerk's office refused to take responsibility for omission and blamed a "part-timer" for the mistake. There was no answer as to who was supposed to check the "part-timer's" work. In any event, the clerk's office would get a complete copy in the mail, if I would just repeat my data to them. I offered to fax the date-less copy to them, but they stated that their fax machine did not always work. Would they send my new document via overnight mail? No, they do not have that capability. Because it was the city's mistake, however, the office would send two copies of the document in today's mail. Let's hope that they put the same date on each!